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100 JOHN KS
The ambiance of death row is difficult to explain Each one of us a stranger, alone, yet one. Welcome to my reality. I have a personal view. From my vantage point, I see the anguish behind each face The hollow searching eyes, Guarded mannerisms Fragile demeanor Lacking smile. I hear the screams of terror in the night. Muffled cries, Quiet prayers for help. The agony of isolation, Loneliness, playing out. What I see reminds me Of what I have become. Afraid to reach out, Not knowing if The hand will be accepted. I keep my fear hidden deep within. How threatening to trust another, Risk hurt, Rejection. Concealed deep inside the abyss of this man made torment. Rebutting their daily attempts to steal my dignity, It is difficult to persevere. Refusing to crumble, Searching for evidence at caring. Every new day, Like each brilliant sunrise. A source of… And of again... |
99 JOHN TX
I saw a Pauper whoses eyes were full of tears, The markings on his face showed he had been crying for years. He tried to be cheerful and present bliss with glee, But heaviness of the heart he could not conceal from me; I spoke words to console and bring peace, content and sate, He heard and he listened, appreciated my bate. Life had been tough with Larshness and lure, The Pauper left me solemnly, more hatred to endure... A Paupers choices are not easily made; chaos, contempt are already laid. He works alone and lonely (his truest friend) The journey has promised him lonely to the End; He reasons in his heart and deeply in his mind, That life interweaved a most evil bind, He begs to the sky, “please have mercy from above” No answer returns, no sympathy, no love; The Pauper fears for this steps wobble aloud, “what´s next?” question his soul, “is itlightning from a cloud?” He did not ask for riches, or even to be the best, Just peace he wished for, so his sore bones could rest... The Pauper bathes from water filled eyes, A horrible world had uglied his guise; He treads by weakness, and shame, and smear, A heart once hopeful, and gentle kindness to endear. In labored traipse the Pauper sang his song, His melody saddened tuned by social wrong. But vibrant or not his voice still gave break, The pain of memory, and lose, teamed with heartache; “Please!” The Pauper begs when no one can hear, The washes his face by a multitude of tears... A pauper is human in flesh made tender, His path was designed to direct him meander, Every trail leads to repine, No gift of miracle has ever consign, But one things for sure and it will not be late, The poor Paupers road will cease by fate... |
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98 ROY FL
Push back the horizon Allow no cloud to bar your passage to the future Go forward and go far I ignore the flimsy curtain that floats beyond your view. Never allow horizons to hurt or hinder you Force them backwards into empty space Fear no deceptive barriers There is nothing but mist and lace Tomorrow calls and beckons Your star is guiding you Sail on and trust the captain to take and bring you through. Patience strong |
97 DENNIS CA
I was once just a child, and a young boy without understanding or knowledge of my spirituality that I was born with “Pure”. Then after years of spending quality time reading, studying and getting to know myself, I was able to quiet my mind, and hear and listen to my inner voice/spirit. I soon came to understand that if I lower my pride and put my ego aside, I would be able to humble myself and grow within – and be a true man. Prior to becoming the man “I am”, there was so much noise inside my mind until I had not a clue as to all the peace I have inside me. It doesn´t matter where I am, I can always quiet myself and find the peace I need within myself. Within my mental state of beautiful peace, my spirit and soul joins together, and the love of God Almighty moves me. Creativity becomes my way, and “Pieces of my soul” I share in many ways. Writing poetry, music, letters of construtiveness to children, teenagers and adults, drawing, painting, and understanding that life isn´t all about me and what all I can habe; but, moreover, what I can give of myself to help others. As I hope you enjoy my poems, please keep in mind that “Pieces of my soul” you will get with each of poems, as “Pieces of my soul” will continue to flow from me to you. As you move forward in your life, I hope that my poetry helps you in some small way to make your day brighter. |
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96 DENNIS CA
Doing time, be it, a day, a week, a month, a year, a decade, I have done 20 years and I say, no time is easy. The one thing that an inmate faces on a perdiem (daily) bases is pure lack of freedom outwardly. 90% of the people that get arrested have not a clue as to who they are or their inner beingg, and the freedom that exists there within them. With this as fact, there is only one of two things that an inmate can do: 1) Do the time 2) Let the time do him or her! One that is in the mold of mentally and physically “do the time” is one that is taking time to collect information that will help one to learn about oneself. For to learn about oneself and be on that path of self-aknowledgment, is to gain most of all Self-Control. Without that one can find oneself “Letting the time do him or her”. And that is what´s known as “Hard-timing”. There are many inmates that refuse to face reality and turn to drugs and homemade wine (Purno). These vices last for a very short time to put one into an unreal state of mind (Fantasy). If you will, only to face the same reality when one comes down from that high back to reality that is always before all of us. I came to the point years ago, that I realized that I was totally non-productive when I was high. In that capacity, I was no more than a failure, and that had to be fixed. I check myself and put an end to getting high, which allowed my brain-power to strengthen, and open up my mind to much of who I am. Today I live by these words: “FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION!” I look at my mind as a computer system, and the only way that a computer is to continue to be productive is if you feed it new information (Data). I read that in which will enlighten me to the knowledge and pass-ways into my inner being, as well as what is going on around me in life. I have heard many inmates talk with very low levels of self-worth, as they come right out and say, “I don´t want to read no books”. I watch these guys and their actions, and I see no self-discipline. I can only hope and pray that one day they will grow up and become men, and learn about themselves, and become an asset to the human-race rather than a hindrance. I say that because I have seen your brothers come into these types of places (jails & prisons) and they mimic just what they see of others that have been where they´ve just arrived to (Death Row). At times, they can witness only two types of behavior (Productive & Non-Productive). Most of the time, the young brothers will mimic the behavior of the non-productive undisciplined type, because he is still just a kid mentally. |
95 MILO FL
The queen said off with his head These words I heard to my dread Lock him in the dungeon until that day No one will hear what he has to say The queen had issued other decree That fate she issued imposed on me Take him away to his cell Where he will feel the pains of hell Let his cries be silent to all Not to be heard beyond the dungeon walls Where apathy will take control Planting seeds of despair upon it´s soul Let his cries echo both day and night Only the dungeon walls will hear his plight Let no one say the queen is wrong And refuse to hear and abuse my throne |
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94 DENNIS CA
Soul 2 Soul, is the making of wonders yet to be told, It is like a young rose in the first days of it´s glow, With a beautiful blossom after the last rain, Always one with nature, And pretty without vain, Always at it best, And dazzling before all guest, For even the peddles that fall, Continue to give their All-n-All. Soul 2 Soul, is a graceful flow, Between the two is unlimited desire to accompany the others feelings, And all communications are like the sweet of a gentle summers breeze, Often so good it brings you to your knees, And for any 2 that share, It is perfect harmony that is theirs. Soul 2 Soul, is that of the Masters Plan, It is the way of life that is meant for all humans Yes, it is the fundation of loving kindness, It is the delight of what is truthfully charity, Charity is the best of a choice when giving of oneself to another, It is the sharing of joy, peace, patience, Kindness, goodness, faithfulness, Gentleness, and self-control, Charity never fails, As it is the gracefulness of Soul 2 Soul. Soul 2 Soul, is more valuable than fine gold, As it is an eternal balance made for us, That we may live together, In peace, and love at it´s best. Soul 2 Soul, is a continuous celebration, It is a party of the heart´s made in heaven, God´s gift to all humanity, We only need to seek His purpose, That should be our goal, And to all I challeng you, To let true love to what it do, And I assure you that God´s Divine Purpose will shine through, For life is the result of love, Love is the result of charity, That only comes from Soul 2 Soul, It is the most dazzling of beauty that you will come to know, For all eternity we are God´s grace, Soul 2 Soul... |
93 WILLIE TX
Beyond the healed bones from “sticks and stones” the pain still remains, My name is... hurt Beyond the chastity lost there lingers a cost a scarring of the soul, My name is... shame Beyond the crime done and the repentance won sorrow has not died, My name is... grief Beyond the addiction broken and the apologies spoken a shattered life yet exists, My name is... regret Beyond disease diagnosed a life´s misery confirmed a stricken body felt, My name is... pain Beyond love mourned a heart left unadorned and dry less tears, My name is... lonely Beyond all that´s desired belief like a raging fire a glimmer remains, My name is... faith Beyond what is seen and everything between you push on and on, My name is... Hope Beyond the prayers said and scriptures read a heart full of joy, My name is... Love |
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92 WILLIE TX
Love bridges the gap between two worlds bordering at the barred visitation-booth window, a window scarred by hate and love-gang graffiti and lovers names forever tattooed on its grimy surface, textured by matching greasy palm prints on each side; Evidence of the efforts to maintain contact. Acrid smoke from burnt bridges, burns my eyes; I produce tears to put the fire out, the air still tastes like ashes, laced with barbed wire – it´s painful to breath it in, to accept it. I´ve watched cheap pain grow layer by layer on visitation-booth walls; over the little grills that filter our voices of the phones, our feelings, our lives, through its tiny canals clogging with waxy build-up. Like the growing callous surrounding the hearts of those who once had feelings for me. Making it hard to be felt, to be heard, over the din of the world. Some tries to entomb me in their past, neck-deep in debris from crumbling crosswalks, and decrepit memories. But I refuse to lie still, to be buried alive, to be forgotten; love dies hard, I live... Still, though dead in eyes of many. My old nickname etched into the steel table, below that barred visitation-booth window, along with and Angel´s wing... A window bearing witness to wide-ranging humanitiy. I´d have to dig through year after year of painted memories, to see the boy I used to be, to remember the way it once was, to see how much I´ve grown – closer to some, apart from others, and into the man I am...Becoming... |
91 WILLIE TX
Don´t let the system steal your determination, optimism or drive, Every day we awaken our mission is to stay alert and remain alive. To live as examples of people who shall wave no white flags of surrendering. Never giving-in to weak-mindedness by sidestepping life´s daily snags. It´s a must that we overcome the hurdles and barriers placed in our way/lives. We can´t effectively change tomorrow by neglecting what´s happening today. Demand to be defined by the present you and not the mistakes of your past, focus on what´s most meaningful to gain success and do all to make it last. Spread positive energy in all you do, so that your conscience remains clear, by doing so you´ll be able to recognize your triumph when it´s near... |
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90 WILLIE TX
In a bush I saw a bird. And I remembered what I´d heard: that birds are worth a lot when caught. Unbiden came to me a thought... I´d catch the birdie in my hand, then with my left I´d hold him and I´d grab another with my right, and hold both with all my might. So this I did, and there I stood wiht both hands full, but still I would secure another bird of worth, to add to my financial/family girth. I tried to catch one with my toe, But how to grasp, my feet don´t know. What more ideas could I try, Ambition mine to satisfy? I had some pockets numbering six; I stuffed them full, put more betwixt My chest and chin. That made them squirm. But I, determined, held them firm. I put some in a birdie cage, The kind that were the going rage, I locked my charges safe within, But, oh, the peace-detracting din! As birdies shrieked and birdies chirped, And birdies called and barked and twirled. It took both hands to stop my ears; I´d nothing left to wipe my tears. Just take these birds away from me, Empty my pockets, set them free. Open the cage so none remain Before they drive me quite insane. The birdies flew over the hill. The eve was quiet and all was still. I leaned back, body now relaxed, Realizing just how much I´d taxed, My mental health for fleeting wealth, My family´s grief for pleasure brief. What can I say on such a day, When all the birds have gone away? I heaved a sigh, I took a nap, I sipped cold water from the tap. I wondered what life´s meaning is, It seems existence had no fizz. Surely it was not intended That one´s clothing need be mended On the seat from all the wear Relaxing and just sitting there. But in that moment came a bird. About this fowl I´d also heard. Its plumage white like when it snowed A message of the truth it showed I caught the bird, I felt its worth, My heart burned now for kingdom girth For clear my burden heart just knew With each bird caught, the kingdom grew. I caught more birds, I worked with haste, For surely there´s no time to waste. My arms grew heavy with the strain, Expanding work I must sustain. My wife and children felt let down; I had not time to reach around, I called for tools to catch more fowl, I called for help, I need it now! I called for wiser heads than mine To give direction, give a sign They helped me to prioritize, Gave new insight and cleared my eyes. There comes a time in every frame, To limit even noble aim. Still I would rather thus expire, Than chase to death my own desires! The End??? This poem I wrote a bit ago Still leaves me things I´d like to know: So I´ll keep writing out each thought, And think out loud each answer sought. How can a catcher surely know, Which birds to catch and which to let go??? When is the effort large enough? When has the strain become too tough?? Did Jesus ever stop and say, “Come back”, we´ll talk another day? Did Paul on record e´er refrain Because of cost, because of strain? Did Peter staunchly e´er refuse One resource of this day to choose, That he might use to spread the news; Expand God´s kingdon thus to use? But on the other hand I see Some children grow up wordly, Because their daddy´s not home, As church work causes him to roam. Perhaps there´s not one certain spot Where everyone must place a dot, Where line is drawn upon the sand, And on that line all take a stand. But EVERY christian brotherhood/sisterhood Must seek together how they should Fulfill commission great and last Of Jesus Christ from centuries past... |
89 SPOON CA
Nothing man makes can Parallel one blade of grass Or one grain of sand No matter if you split The atom and discombobulate Its structure and blow Up mountains Nothing man makes Can parallel one flower, One stream, one sun ray, One moon glow No matter how much You strive to be God Of this world, this planet Looking back, you think In time Seeing stars born- Black holes grow Rings around Saturn Nothing man does man Even make you God Over the tiniest Planet in the solar system |
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88 SPOON CA
When you breath in I want to breath out I want to know you From the inside out Like a tree knows Its rings Like a flower knows Its stem, petals Like a lion knows Its fur |
87 SPOON CA
It took a life sentence To show me how To love and live It took a life sentence To show me how To look away So close your eyes If you don´t like the color Of my skin Close your eyes If you are not willing To look within. |
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86 SPOON CA
If it breaks your heart And makes you warm Dreams dark I am sorry I adore you If the sun shines Less on you And mother moon reflects Less in your eyes I am sorry I dream of you If the four winds cry And the grasses Under your toes Never allowed you to feel Earth mothers flow If these words never Allowed you to know How deeply I care If I never told you How I felt It would have caused A drought in other Parts of me |
85 ROY FL
When you´re laying in bed and waiting for sleep Take a few moments and think of me Who knows, maybe our dreams will cross And the ones that I have may even become yours As I speak or share my life, feelings and words With you in a very special way I could even give to you all the joys and sadnesses I feel And when we do meet A very rare meeting it will be And a very blessed date it will be You never need to be or sleep alone If you think of me While you are there at home In bed all alone... |
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84 RONALD FL
Razor-wire fence, I am held in suspense, Surrounded by concrete and steel, Held to surrender to their will. Premeditated hate, I await my fate, And one day I will, Face an execution date. Step off in a room... I will feel the doom, Strapped to a table, Completely unable. My last words will be heard, I will speak them loud, And hold my head proud, And then I´ll say: An eye for an eye And a tooth for a tooth, But I am here to share, To share the truth. And eye for an eye, America will cry, But I am here to say That that´s a lie. For a rich man will walk, And a poor man will die. And that we can´t deny, Nor can we justify. Worst of the worst, Maybe so, For it´s a lawyer that Put me here on Death Row. Assigned by the state To determine my fate. I was white trash, Just another junkie, That´s why they assigned me A two-bit flunky. And I knew At first glance That I didn´t stand And kind of chance. |
83 RONALD FL
Here where insanity looms In the implorable cage of doom Where you shall launguish In complete mental anguish For here days turn to weeks Weeks into months and months into years All blended together With devastating tears Insanity shall rain Causing heartache and pain For it shall appear That insanity is near Captavated and distraught With suicidal thoughts Whithering here under the sentence of death Smothered by this cage Gasping for breath In the implorable cage, cage of the doom Where insanity clearly, clearly looms. |
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82 RONALD FL
I struggle with my hopes I struggle with my dreams And I struggle everday With my life, it seems. Stretching one day Off into another, Existing in this world For my mother. A world so, so unkind Unliker hers this is mine Held off-in suspense Held in by razor wire fence. Concrete, steel and stone I´m left here all alone, Where days turn into weeks Weeks into months And months into years, Blended together With so many tears A world of doom, a tiny cage, A small ass room, Nine by six feet Of linving space. A world like no other place Two worlds, two hearts Separated miles apart. Yes, unlike her´s this is mine A world that is so, so unkind. |
81 RONALD FL
I know loneliness Like most will never know I know loneliness Like most will never feel I know loneliness A feeling that´s so surreal I know loneliness Like no one should ever know I know loneliness I know its feel For I am captavated by it Held to its will. I know loneliness I know it´s self defiance I know loneliness I know it´s deadly silence I know it all too well For this loneliness Is my deep dark hell. |
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80 RONALD FL
I strain to look out, so far away, Through the crack in the window, At the dawn of the day. To catch a glimpse of freedom Far off in the distance Escaping this cage And my daunting existence. I can see freedom But only in my past So please tell me why Am I trying to last?! Existing in this world That has deminished all hope So please tell me how I am supposed to cope? For I stand at my cell bars Staring off in the distance Yet I still have a to cope With my daunting existence |
79 RONALD FL
Death Row is a place Where a man is disgraced Where flies don´t land And birds don´t sing Where there´s no love For anything Where one seeks love But can not find For people truly feel We are a waste of time So you sit in your cage Day after day, And watch your life Waste away. You have no hopes You have no dreams You have no meaning It surely seems |
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78 RONALD FL
A Date with Death Sit back and let me take you, step by step, through a hideous, outragious, unbelievable adventure, that hopefully you will never experience. This is a world and the fate of a man doomed by Capital Punishment, The Judges states, you are to be taken to the Florida Department of Corrections, where you will be held until such a time where a deadly mixture will be ran through your body, until you are pronounced “dead”. May God have mercy on your soul. You are then sent to Florida State Prison (F.S.P) and placed on G-Wing, in a 9x6 foot cell, where you will spent 164 out of 168 hours a week, of the most miserable from of confinement there is. You will be housed here at F.S.P until room is available at Union Correctional Institution (U.C.I). Where 300 plus death row inmates are housed, awaiting the final outcome of their appeals. You may sit in one of these celles 10, 15, 20 even 25 years awaiting the final decision. Over these years, you will make friends with some of these men, and you will watch as some of these men deteriorate under the imminent imperil of death, or the pressure of existing year in and year out in a 9x6...54 square foot cage. Condition´s the human mind are not meant, and in some case´s not capable of dealing with. You will pass by cell´s going to medical, etc... and see the anguish and stress on the faces of men, who know their appeals are exhausted and at any minute their death warrant may be signed. For once your appeals are exhausted in the United States Supreme Court, your file is sent to the Governor´s office in Tallahassee, where it is reviewed. You are then geven a clemency hearing. You will be turned down and you know it, clemency is not given, they´re just going through the motions. So after that the governor signs your death warrant, placing the time and date on it. 7:00 pm April 20, 2006 The warrant is then flown to Raiford, FL and handed to the Warden at U.C.I. The warden will send his officers to retrieve you. they will make a show of it, coming 10 to 12 officers deep. Your attorney will have warned you weeks in advance that your file is on the Governor´s desk, and your warrant is going to be signed. So everytime you hear the electric door pop at the front of the wing, you ask yourself, ar they coming for me? That door may pop two dozen times a day. So by the time the 10 to 12 officers do show up, your nerves are shot! So they come to your cell front and state, get dressed. You will go through a strip search, be handcuffed, and escorted our front where the Warden will be waiting for you. Officers will be sent in to pack your property and send it to F.S.P. You step into the office, in front of the Warden, where he reads you the warrant, informing you of the date and time of your death/murder. You will then be escorted outside, placed in a van and driven to F.S.P under heavy surveillance. You will arrive at the back ramp that leads to the 2nd floor, this is the same ramp you walked years earlier, upon your arrival at F.S.P. You will walk up the ramp, and enter the rear of the building, walking straight down the hall, 40 to 45 yards, coming to a section called “times square” an electronic gate will open, you will enter it, turning to your left, walking 10 yards where you will stop at another electronic gate, waiting for it to open, where you will continue on 10 more yards, coming at a stop at another gate. An officer will come out of the other side of the gate to your right and open the gate with a key. You will enter the gate turning to your right, entering the door where the officer came from. You will now have entered the clinic, where you will be examined. You will then be escorted back out the same way you came in, only you will not make a turn at “times square” you will keep walking some 200 yards, going through 3 electronic gates, passing 12 wings, that house some 1´200 inmates at F.S.P.Upon entering the 3rd and final gate, and walking the final 25 yards, you will G-wing, the wing you were housed on years earlier. You have reached the end, come to a stop at a solid, steel door, done in black and tan, with a big black letter “Q” written over the top of the door. The officer´s open the door. You step inside, over to your left, is a Sgts. desk, to the right of the desk you will see a board, attached to the wall, with names written on it in black ink, the top of the board has 12 cell´s listing the names of the individuals, the middle of the board has the same listing. These are inmates that have been involved in something serious. You glance down to the bottom of the board, on the right side. Three cells are listed, and you see your name and number and the date and time of your execution. To your right is a stair case, two sets, one going up, the other is going down. You walk down the first 8 to 10 steps, turn to your right, and go down the remaining 8 to 10 steps, again turning to your right, where you see another board, again, with 3 cells, your name and number, and date and time of execution is again listed and the cell where you will be spending the next 30 to 60 days of your life. You will pass these boards each time you see your attorney, preacher or spiritual advisor, or going to visits or medical, so you will be reminded and re-reminded on a daily basis of the date and time your life will end. You step towards the board, a gate door is opened manually by key, you step through, another Sgt. desk is to your right. This is for the Sgt. that oversees 3 cells which are called “Death Watch Cells”. To your left, a gate is again opened with a key. You walk through and down about 12 to 14 feet where the door is opened to your left. You step through and the officers shuts the bar doors, removing the cuffs and chains. You look around at the sink, toilet, and steel bunk with the thin mattress that you´ve grown so accustomed to over the years, but your thoughts immediately go to all of the men you´ve known over the years and how many have spent their last remaining days sleeping restless nights on that very bunk. You pace back and forth with so many thoughts, thoughts of the past, of the present, of the remaining 30 to 60 days, and the strength and courage your mus show for the sake of your family and loved ones, and the pain and anguish you must endure. Your property arrives and is placed in the cell with you. So you take out your pen and paper, and start writing letters, saying your good-byes to family and friends that are unable or unwilling to come visit. The days have passed rather fast, and you´re down to the last week. Seven days left to live. Your property is removed from the cell, placed outside the cell in cardboard boxed. An officer will now be stationed in front of your cell, watching and logging down your every move for the next seven days. So he will hand you a book, paper, pen, etc... from your property, you will return it when you are finished. Today is Friday April 14th, 2006, the last Friday you will be alive. The next few days pass. Your thoughts continue to fall upon that your, last Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, you are measured for your clothes that you will be executed in. It´s Wednesday April 19th, 2006, 07:00 pm. You have 24 hours to live. This time, tomorrow, you will in the chamber. But, you´re now being relocated to the backside. So you are escorted back out, once you step through the gate where the Sgt. desk is located. You will pass the board with your name, number and tomorrow´s date on it, with the execution time 7:00pm. You walk another 12 to 14 feet and come to a solid door, it´s opened, you step through, walking 3 feet, turning to your right, walking through another gate, 12 to 14 feet. Three cells are located to your right, but 3 to 4 feet ahead of them is a large sliding gray door. Behind this door is Florida´s death chamber, that has seen many a soul´s taken. Some guilty, some not, but all the same, taken under the false pretense of Justice. You enter one of the 3 cells. You´re given your last mea. Also, you will soon have a last visit with your family. So you will be escorted up front. The visit is anything but a joyous occasion, for you to see the pain and anguish all over your loved ones faces. That´s when you realize that your suffering ends in less than 24 hours, but your families suffering will continue on. You think to yourself, is it I or they, who are truly sentenced? The visit ends in what is a tearful goodbye. You´re escorted back to the cell. People you´ve never seen are constantly coming down to see you. Most are big wigs from Tallahassee. You get a restless night´s sleep. Awakening to your big day, Thursday April 20th 2006. You have less than 12 hours left to live. The time ticks off, minute by minute, hour by hour, it is now 6:00pm. The medical tech comes to see you. He looks at your arms to see where he is going to hook up the I.V. The big gray door slides open and the gurney, thinking of all the men who have expired here. You are removed from the cell, you´re layed upon the gurney, officers putting leather straps on your wrists, ankles, across your chest, and even your forehead. The medical tech hooks two I.V´s up. A back up to ensure everything in their plan goes well. You´re pushed into the execution chamber. People are hooking tubes to the I.V. You look into a mirror that is positioned over head at an angle. You see a curtain. You hear a slam, as the large gray door to the chamber is being shut. Your heart is racing faster than it ever has. The Wardens gives the signal, you the curtain being pulled back, it is opened to reveal many faces, some recognizable, most not. Victim´s family, your two witnesses and members of the media. The Warden starts off reading the warrant, stating that you have been convicted by a jury of your peers and sentenced to die, on this 20th day of April 2006. May God have mercy on your soul. Then he states, do you have any last words. Upon your final words, the Warden gives a hidden signal to the executioner. The executioner releases a deadly mixture that is now running through the tubes, into your veins. A last thought goes to your loved ones. You look at the many faces staring back at you. Closing your eyes for the final time. The medical tech comes in at 7:19pm, taking your vital signs and pronouncing you dead at 7:23pm. The curtain closes, and the witnesses are taken out of the rear of Q-wing to awaiting vans that carry them out. And the clean up begins, a white hearse pulls through the rear gate and to the back of Q-wing, where your lifeless body is loaded in it, and driven off to the morgue. Within a few weeks, a box arrives at your families, inside are your personal belongings. The deed is done, and the mourning continues. This act was committed under the mantel of Justice, by a civilized society that proclaims the Roman Empire to be barbaric. Yet, what I just described is the highest form of premeditated murder that has ever taken place! A murder planned to the precise minute, where their fellow citizens sit around and view this horrific case of state sanctioned homicide. A penalty that is arbitrarily and capriciously handed out to the poor. For the only true equality in the American legal system is the poor equally get screwed by a system portraying Equal Justice. |
77 GUSTAVO TX
Heard a voice the other day. Was it real... or am I going crazy? How do I know? Wondering what to do today. Do I draw? Nah, getting burned out. Do I read? Nah, can´t focus on the words. What did I do today? Stared at the walls of my cage and imagined fanciful creatures and images from the peeling paint and bare concrete showing through... Like I did when I was a kid staring at clouds. Passing out mail....My heart is racing! Maybe I´ll get mail tonight! Guard walks by my cell, never showing down. No mail. I wait a moment...maybe he´ll find something for me and come back. I give a deep sigh, and step away from the door and sit on my bunk. Again no mail. Sitting on my bunk, thinking of everyone I love and care about, wondering if they´re okay... Hoping they´re okay. I miss them so much! Another day. Thankfully no voices to make me question my sanity. Received mails from an old flame. I smiled, and went down memory lane! Today I say good-bye. I´m scheduled to die, and I would say please don´t cry, but you´ll cry anyway. Instead I´ll say, when you´re done crying, look at a cloud and smile... And I´ll smile back. |
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76 CHRIS FL
Dear Lord.., I got to thank you Dear Lord.., you been with me Dear Lord.., through the thick and thin Dear Lord.., how can it be Dear Lord.., you watch over me |
75 SPOON CA
When my heart was broken and heavy with pain you came to me and loved me without shame When my life was hell and I had nothing to hold on too - you came to me and gave me nothing but love |
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CA SPOON 74
The sky isn’t always blue and I didn’t see it coming I believed in you I didn’t see it coming for how many colors one never sees in a rainbow I trusted you to never let go I trusted you more than the moon the sun I trusted you to always be true |
73 SPOON CA
In time The great pyramids May crumble to the ground The seven wonders of the world Someday may not be so wonderful These bodies where we live Someday may return to dust Yet, I will want to hug and hold you For however long, forever is |
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CA SPOON 72
I cannot go on like this But I will go on - on and on, even when on is off. Something is stirring in my soul, wanting to burst out like a hot spring in the desert wanting to come out and I don’t know what it is - in the moment I hope it’s a poem I hope it’s a song Something vast like Euripides Something wise and funny like Aristophanes Something deep like Langston Hughes So deep in the seas where no light goes I know what it is I want to create my way off this lockdown and write my way out of prison They allowed redemption once, but now only condemnation I cannot go on but I will go on - on and on even when on becomes off Melancholic and sad They are letting some lifers go home some I have known for a lifetime and that is a good thing Yet there is no end in sight for me and I don’t know anymore where to go to get strength to go on I don’t know where to go to leave this sadness and pain and make my heart sing again and make my spirit soar again Everywhere I look there is a big sign that says no - No forgiveness, no love no hope no second chance, no dreams and no romance I cannot go on but I will go on - and on and on even when on becomes off But I have nowhere to go Nowhere that says Yes Yes, it’s okay to dream for some come true Yes, it’s okay to hope for freedom is free Yes, it’s okay to love for love can be true |
71 SPOON CA
Restless, unable to sleep Keys, bars, guns being racked Year after year Endless echoes Of steel kissing steel Noise Constant yelling Nothing said Vegetation faces, lost faces Dusted faces A lifer A dreamer Tomorrow’s a dream Yesterday’s a memory Both a passing of a cloud How I long For the silence of a raindrop Falling gently to earth The magnificence of a rose Blooming into its many hues Of color The brillance of a rainbow When it sweetly lights up the sky After a pounding rainfall Picnics in a rich green meadow We saw the beauty in butterflies We made it our symbol Tiny grains of sand One hour glass A tear that may engender A waterfall The memories The dreams Are now Love is now There’s no beauty in cell bars |
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70 SPOON CA
We lock ourselves up not because of the bars and steel that surround us not because life doesn’t bend to our every whim But because of the projections We place onto our worlds The judgments, the I can’ts The trying to please everyone while not pleasing ourselves By seeking the beauty on the outside that is surely within For prisons are created internally and are found everywhere We allow unnatural and Unreal thoughts to be our walls, our limits Because of the dam we build to stop the universal love, the light It’s all within ourselves this paradise you go to of beauty and love There’s peace, where along with the eagle you may soar A place inside that was inspired from the inner and above which are one and the same The world may not bend to your every whim But it will flow wherever you want it to go, where it’s supposed to go There’s beauty in cell bars |
69 SPOON CA
I dreamt about you once when tiny raindrops cascaded across the window pane I dreamt about you once when the snow-flakes covered the woodland and made it too cold to go outside for weeks I dreamt about you once when the wind rushed through the aspens and the tall grass grew to its fullest I dreamt about you once when I watched your crimson painted toes like no others on tiny grains of sand How long will I only be a few sheets of paper, a stamp an envelope ? How many more words must we share Before I can see your smile — the way Your lips part to speak: the way your hair looks when touched by the wind… How long will I milden in your past ? When I look out, over the bay, every ripple, Each wave is a thought, a sweet memory of you. There are so many ripples, so many waves The fragrance and taste of you is still in the air The softness of your skin is still upon my fingertips How many more nights sleepless and long must I endure creating faces and bodies that are not yours ? |
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68 MICHAEL TX
I could be vengeful and feed my anger's hunger But to uplift your consciousness do I have to become a monster? |
65 WILLIE TX
There is in me A being little known To others A person, man or boy Locked away I believe that he is me More me than the one Anyone knows And that he deserves at least A trial Before being sealed away Forever Locked inside The public face I am still a child Thrilled by a sunrise Touched by a bird-song Delighted by a clown Frightened by hatred hurt by rejection Sadden by pain warmed by love…. |
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64 WILLIE TX
I am not alone, although I feels it at times. there are times when I think I am, Feel like I am Alone and lost… But as the river bends, and the drifting traveller Sees the unfolding of new vistas, New horizons, New landmarks, I find a new communion with the turn of time, A new sense of Universal connection. And then… One day in the spring of my life, the buds and blossoms appear, I am alive, I am here, at least for now…. |
63 WILLIE TX
In my heart Is the seed of the tree which will be me Nourished by understanding Warmed by friends Fed by loved ones Matured by wisdom Tempered by tears and years… |
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62 WILLIE TX
If the sun turns cold, If the night is too dark, long and lonely, Try Me If your trust has been betrayed, If dreams won’t come true, When hope seem to crumble and fade to dust, Try Me If your sadness leaves a void, An emptiness which can’t be filled, except by love, Try Me |
61 RONALD FL
Sit back in here and hear my tale Of what it´s like in a prison cell A musky scent reminds of gent A nine by six foot little cage chains’ up frustration and a lot of rage Twenty-four seven, three sixty five Listening to all this jive Bickering and arguing and some idiots trying to sing the toilet flushes, a locker slams with a hard crush Dudes get mad… and baby all that steel makes a sissy bad Peace and tranquility are things of the past Now you can only try to laugh One more day, another hour Somehow try to find the power Now that´s a degree of my tale Of a little tiny prison cell |
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60 JEFF TX
Evil eyes watch you at all times of day They watch you, intent on making you a victim of their hindered game They are like a demon drawn to flame They watch your fear drain from your eyes as you scream out in vain They track you to serve a purpose in their life It might be sexual, or painful to satisfy The lust or sickness that´s deep embedded in their mind They watch you tremble of fear, torture or death It gets them off as you beg and beg until your dying breath |
59 RONALD FL
Dreams come and dreams go As I sit here on death-row And getting old seems so fake How much more can I take My mind is starting to slip And I keep trying to get a grip But will insanity get the upper hand and I wonder off to never Neverland And this year I truly find I don´t want to lose my mind Behind these bars, I see no stars I´m starting to lose our hope And I am truly thinking about a rope I sing and sleep and take a trip Yes this cell is total hell You have to be, to be so strong Yet the days they seem so long Can I take it? Will I make it? These are questions that I ask How much longer will I last. |
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58 RONALD FL
I was dealing drugs and hanging with thugs I was just fifteen and in the drugs scene I was high as a kite both day and night I was quite wild but I was only a child And troubles just seem to come my way I was running into it everyday And these sweet drugs will bring you too For I was sitting on death-row at 22 Still looking for some residue |
57 RONALD FL
I sit in a building called FSP* Better known as “the green monster” And it´s all I can see In the belly of the monster Life is just a blur In the belly of the beast Life is valued the least At the south end of the monster Sits a clinic for health care At the north end of the monster Sits the electric chair Yet, this monster will discriminate For money can determine, determine your fate Now this monster has taken many a soul Yet mainly for a politician, A politicians´goal at all costs, Lives will be lost in the belly of the beast, where life is valued the least *Florida State Prison |
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56 RONALD FL
Sitting here on death row Our time is surely running low We all have to die one day But why should it be this way ? Let us die with dignity Not in a room for all to see With witnesses looking on You take a life, like that's not wrong. So you've killed to say killing isn't right And still can't see anything wrong with this sight. And then you ask why your kids are killing ? Well, they just see the blood you're spilling They are only doing the same So you only have yourself to blame |
55 RONALD FL
I´m kept in a cell like I got a disease I put my suicidal thoughts in tendencies For this here I often find The suicide way on my mind For I can´t see a whole lot of hope So suicidal thoughts is the way I cope Fear of death-row is just the unknown know my fear is being left behind steel and stones So at night I often, often pray That death-row come, come today And suicide won´t be my final way If I´m kept in a cell like I got a disease Slept with my suicidal thoughts and tendencies |
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54 RONALD FL
Paper wings and childhood dreams, And life is never what it seems; Seeing life through a child's eyes, Paper wings and blue skies. but at a tender, tender age, We're taught to love and to hate, Or even to discriminate. And as we approach adolescence, We see life in its true essence, Death and devastation, Or maybe experience molestation. Changing views, changing thoughts, Maybe even becoming distraught, Broken promises, paper wings, False hope of childhood dreams, That's the way life truly seems. |
53 RONALD FL
Razor wire fence I’m held in suspense Surrounded by concrete and steel Held to surrender to your will Premeditated hate I await my fate And now I must face this execution date Step off in a room I feel the doom And I look around Just strapping me down Strapped to a table Completely unable My last words will be heard I will speak them loud And hold my head, proud And then I will say: An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth But I´m here to share, to share the truth For this here I have no doubt This is truly what it’s all about An eye for an eye America will cry But I´m here to say that´s a lie For rich man will walk And a poor man will die And this we can´t deny Nor can we justify Worst of the worst Yeah, maybe so For it´s a lawyer who puts me here on death row Assigned by the state To determine my fate I was white trash Just another junkie That´s why they assigned me A two-bit flunky And I knew at frist glance I didn’t stand any kind of a chance |
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52 RONALD FL
I’m strapped to a gurney For my final journey For the all to see Premeditated homicide is what it will be the liquid will flow, through the IV below My eyes will shut My lungs will collapse And my heart will burst And my body will be driven off In a pearly white hearse In the name of justice Is what they will cry But the justice they seek was nothing more than a lie It was all quite phony With false testimony The trial was a sham Wrap from the skank The trial was a shame Yes one big scam Justice was denied They took the wrong side now as I am slaying for their revenge and pain one question you must ask or maybe you´re not up to the task of finding out that justice justice was a lie and yes, you killed, you killed, you killed the wrong guy |
51 RONALD FL
I´ve seen grey skies Tear drops and lies The anguish and pain Caused by cocaine I´ve seen it done by Demerol From the LSD and alcohol Trying to escape life´s confusion Off in a bottle, life feels the illusion But we can´t truly escape reality Through cocaine, weed or ecstasy For it will never ever set us free Yet, it will cause so much pain And in the end, you´ll see it´s in vain For drugs will lead you to a dead end Street The prison, ghetto or death you will meet And this is my contribution To show you drug is not the solution |
